the sermon was on how as Christians, half of the good news of the Gospel is that
we are freed from ever having to sin again!! and listening this morning reminded me
SO MUCH of what john bevere had said in 'extraordinary' so i was definitely into it
and taking notes and really paying attention.
and...
my day just was GREAT. i mean, i'm physically tired but that's to be expected
when you work crazy shifts in retail for 4 days straight (i know, i know not a LOT
of hours, but BUSY CRAZY hours, VERY high volume and high traffic days this weekend)
so yeah it was an overall good day... and i was doing well i believed.
and then when i got home, just like i'd been waiting for and just like i'd been
warned by sooo many people, i just got SLAMMED by the enemy. it was
RELENTLESS. and i know, i know that i am still learning to fight and that
failing this time didn't bring about death and destruction... or did it?!?
pastor made it VERY clear this morning, just SO concisely that sin has severe
consequences and even ONE sin can completely alter the path God has for us.
and how i feel right now?
well okay, for you harry potter fans, this will help explain (for those who are not,
you'll just have to bear with me here as i attempt to use an analogy) well anyway,
in harry potter, voldemort has horcruxes and professor slughorn explains to harry
(er,, i think it's slughorn) that killing rips the soul apart and that's how you can create
a horcrux. well, that is how i feel right now, like i have had the sharpest knife jabbed
into my soul where it seemed perfect with God before has now been disturbed and changed.
oh and believe me, i am on my knees before Him already... getting filled with the Spirit
just CHANGED me and i am grateful for that, and grateful that i know that there is so
much more than just being okay. this rotten guilt will be lifted soon, and i have wronged
Him, and i know it. also though, i know His love for me never ever changes. for that i am
also thankful♥
i think my point in this post is a) it's my blog and i like to write about good and the bad, and
b) to remind everyone that even though i've been doing well, yeah, i do still mess up, and i
definitely don't have a 'holier than thou' viewpoint on my life. i just have grace, by the
incredible and undeserved blessing of God. and that is how i shall get through.
our God is greater,
our God is stronger,
God, You are higher than any other,
our God is healer, awesome in power,
our God, our God...
and if our God is for us,
than who could ever stop us?
and if our God is with us,
then what could stand against?
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